Monday, April 30, 2007

Oregon Trail 2000, the RPG

These days I am playing my own sordid version of Oregon Trail, wherein I battle ticks, solar radiation poisoning and dehydration, and try to avoid unfriendly locals who want to shoot me off their property unless I flirt or cry. My cowboy hat usually functions as +1 Stealth versus Rednecks, but sometimes those fuckers roll a 20, and the red tail hawk feather in my hat gives me away as some liberal biologist-type.

I also sometimes end up with the ailment of "some spiny thing in my boot", "some wet squishy thing in my boot" or hafta dirt-ski down a 45-degree slope to save myself an extra half mile of hiking, which often results in said ailments. Fortunately, I have immunity to poison oak and bee stings, and I'm only like 100 xp away from another ding. My next quest is "Navigating Through Douglas County With An Aerial Photo & 30-Year Old Topo Map".

* * * *

I'm in Roseburg again. I ate granola and yogurt for dinner in attempt to horde my paltry $110 per diem. Maker's Mark isn't covered by my per diem.

Sunday, April 08, 2007

Learned something new today!

The Maillard reaction, commonly known among chefs for creating delicious flavors on seared meats (although usually not scientifically, uneducated lot) is also responsible for the browning effects in self-tanning products. Thank you, Wikipedia!

Hey, so today is Zombie Jesus Day (aka Easter) but it's also the 2-year anniversary of my mom's death. Do I go all Jew on that shit and burn a Yahrzeit candle (not that I'm Jewish, but what the hell, it's Passover), or go with my white-trash roots and drink? Oh, too late. Cheers! I pour out a bit for my fallen negro. Mom, we hardly knew ye.